I'm learning this lesson the hard way, it turns out. I had NO idea before I became a mom how difficult it can sometimes be to get babies to sleep. No idea! Caleb is an amazing sleeper- at night. He has a good four hour stretch of sleep, wakes up to eat, sleeps for another two hours, wakes up to eat, then sleeps for another three hours. Lovely. I can work with that and I feel pretty well rested most of the time.
During the day, however, is a completely different story. My goodness! For awhile, my boy would only fall asleep if I was wearing him on my chest in his carrier. Which is lovely, at times, but it does make it hard to get stuff done. I've kind of learned how to do some things like this, but it's definitely challenging. I'm trying to stop relying on the carrier so much, especially since it gives me a bit of a backache if I wear it for a large portion of the day. So we rock, we cuddle, we bounce... I do what I have to in order to get those naps in.
During the day, however, is a completely different story. My goodness! For awhile, my boy would only fall asleep if I was wearing him on my chest in his carrier. Which is lovely, at times, but it does make it hard to get stuff done. I've kind of learned how to do some things like this, but it's definitely challenging. I'm trying to stop relying on the carrier so much, especially since it gives me a bit of a backache if I wear it for a large portion of the day. So we rock, we cuddle, we bounce... I do what I have to in order to get those naps in.
Here's the tricky part- keeping him asleep. There's nothing worse than spending a half an hour (or more!) shushing a tiny, overtired baby to sleep only to try to transfer him to his bed and have him wake up. It's awful. Because then the whole process starts over again, only now he's upset.
To be honest, I'm starting to dread people asking about his sleep habits. I keep it short and to the point, because I've learned that everyone has advice, everyone has stories of what worked or didn't for them, and (worst of all) everyone has a list of things you shouldn't do that they're super eager to share with you. And it turns out that, if you're like me, you either become defensive or you start to second guess yourself and feel like an awful mom. Or both. Things like, "Don't ever let him sleep in your bed" and "Don't let him get used to sleeping in total silence, he needs to be able to sleep anywhere" and "Don't always rock him to sleep, you'll spoil him" and "Don't let him sleep in different places during the day, you need to teach him that his bed is for sleeping" and "Always swaddle him" or "Don't always swaddle him" ... none of those are helpful. At all. (Don't even get me started on "Sleep when the baby sleeps." Seriously.)
Because here's the thing about all that advice- every kid is different. And when you have a tiny baby, and he fusses if you put him down and your house is a mess and you haven't eaten anything more than a handful of Fritos in six hours, guess what? You're going to let that baby sleep when, where, and however he wants to. And I think that's okay. For example, today Caleb fell asleep in the bathroom during my shower. When I got out, I briefly considered dragging his bassinet back to the bedroom where it belongs (a whole ten feet away), but I decided not to risk it. So that's where he is right now, sleeping soundly... for the moment. And I don't care. Because it's after 3:00 and I hadn't had lunch yet and he hasn't napped more than twenty minutes all day. So I'll keep the boy happy and leave him in the bathroom.
To be honest, I'm starting to dread people asking about his sleep habits. I keep it short and to the point, because I've learned that everyone has advice, everyone has stories of what worked or didn't for them, and (worst of all) everyone has a list of things you shouldn't do that they're super eager to share with you. And it turns out that, if you're like me, you either become defensive or you start to second guess yourself and feel like an awful mom. Or both. Things like, "Don't ever let him sleep in your bed" and "Don't let him get used to sleeping in total silence, he needs to be able to sleep anywhere" and "Don't always rock him to sleep, you'll spoil him" and "Don't let him sleep in different places during the day, you need to teach him that his bed is for sleeping" and "Always swaddle him" or "Don't always swaddle him" ... none of those are helpful. At all. (Don't even get me started on "Sleep when the baby sleeps." Seriously.)
Because here's the thing about all that advice- every kid is different. And when you have a tiny baby, and he fusses if you put him down and your house is a mess and you haven't eaten anything more than a handful of Fritos in six hours, guess what? You're going to let that baby sleep when, where, and however he wants to. And I think that's okay. For example, today Caleb fell asleep in the bathroom during my shower. When I got out, I briefly considered dragging his bassinet back to the bedroom where it belongs (a whole ten feet away), but I decided not to risk it. So that's where he is right now, sleeping soundly... for the moment. And I don't care. Because it's after 3:00 and I hadn't had lunch yet and he hasn't napped more than twenty minutes all day. So I'll keep the boy happy and leave him in the bathroom.
I'm choosing to believe my pediatrician when he says that sleep habits aren't created this early in a baby's life. That letting him sleep is more important than trying to "train" him. And that works for me. Babies are unpredictable. There are times that the tiniest creak in the floor wake Caleb up from a deep sleep, and there are other times, like last night, when he falls asleep in his carseat and stays asleep through taking him out of the car, bringing him inside and setting him down, us clattering around in the kitchen making dinner, turning the television on and catching up on How I Met Your Mother, and keeping the lights blazing for two hours. You just never know, I guess. Babies are weird. So I do what I have to to keep that sleepy baby sleeping.
Let sleeping babies lie. That's what I do... most of the time. The other night around 11pm, I'd been trying to get him to sleep for over an hour. After a lot of other things, I spent some time holding him on my shoulder, rocking him, and rubbing his back, and he'd finally fallen asleep. I was ridiculously tired at that point, so I waited an extra long time before trying to move him to his bed so that I could finally sleep. When I did, it went perfectly. I laid him down, he curled up under his blanket and sighed a few times, I brushed my teeth and cleared the laundry off of my bed (still haven't folded all of it...), and then I looked down at him. He has these unbelievably adorable chubby cheeks, and they were all squished up and looked extra kissable. So I bent down and gave him the tiniest, softest kiss on his little cheek and BAM! His eyes fly open. What had I done?!? I wanted to cry because I was so close to finally shutting my eyes. But to my surprise, he didn't scream or squirm, he just smiled (and oh my gosh, melt my heart). I rocked him a few times and right back to sleep the baby went.
Even if he had cried, that kiss? Totally worth it.
Sleep well, friends. :)
Let sleeping babies lie. That's what I do... most of the time. The other night around 11pm, I'd been trying to get him to sleep for over an hour. After a lot of other things, I spent some time holding him on my shoulder, rocking him, and rubbing his back, and he'd finally fallen asleep. I was ridiculously tired at that point, so I waited an extra long time before trying to move him to his bed so that I could finally sleep. When I did, it went perfectly. I laid him down, he curled up under his blanket and sighed a few times, I brushed my teeth and cleared the laundry off of my bed (still haven't folded all of it...), and then I looked down at him. He has these unbelievably adorable chubby cheeks, and they were all squished up and looked extra kissable. So I bent down and gave him the tiniest, softest kiss on his little cheek and BAM! His eyes fly open. What had I done?!? I wanted to cry because I was so close to finally shutting my eyes. But to my surprise, he didn't scream or squirm, he just smiled (and oh my gosh, melt my heart). I rocked him a few times and right back to sleep the baby went.
Even if he had cried, that kiss? Totally worth it.
Sleep well, friends. :)